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COVID-19: Family fatigue is real and it's threatening your mental health in quarantine

When it comes to spending time with the same people day after day, taking time away from your living situation and taking time for yourself is a key step we can all take. In this rare example, when it comes to family time, less is sometimes more
2020 05 08 Hands
The Hands building on Oak Street East in North Bay was lit up green for Mental Health Week. Photo by Bob Pipe.

Extraordinary times often lead to extraordinary measures — especially when it comes to fostering positive mental health for you and your loved ones. 

When it comes to spending time with the same people day after day, taking time away from your living situation and taking time for yourself is a key step we can all take. In this rare example, when it comes to family time, less is sometimes more.

As they observe Mental Health Week in Canada, the expertise and advice of the child and family therapy team at Hands TheFamilyHelpNetwork.ca continues to be in demand. Services are operating with the technical adjustments required during COVID-19 self-isolation times. 

Hands recognizes the COVID-19 pandemic and quarantine is creating a strain on mental health for many families. Some stressors include working from home, homeschooling, living in social isolation, and, for many families, living under financial constraints.

To draw awareness to Mental Health Week, Roxanne Lefebvre, Family Service Coordinator -Child/Youth Mental Health Services took some time to catch us up on what the folks at Hands have been doing to help children and their parents cope during these trying times, what services are available to those seeking assistance, and why taking a break from it all comes highly recommended.

Lefebvre says many children, teens and their families are feeling increased anxiety, isolation, loss, and uncertainty. School has shifted to an online platform that can be stressful in itself for young learners (and homeschooling parents and guardians). The social aspect of the school day has changed and in-person social circles have been broken. The lack of routine and less structured schedule of the home school day can also weigh heavily on young, developing minds.

While finding a balance for families to spend enough time together was common previous to the pandemic, now the challenge is not spending too much time together to the point it threatens to become a stressor of its own. Just a few months ago, seeing one's family for a few hours per day was normal. Now, with schooling and working from home, some likely go days or even weeks without much of a change of scenery. If variety is the spice of life, having similar conversations with the same people for weeks on end can certainly be a trigger for domestic upheaval.

"Scheduling some activities outside to decompress on your own, recognizing some alone time is always a good thing," goes a long way to good mental health, says Lefebvre. "This goes for children and parents."

Parents are also in danger of over-compensating for all of the free hours in the day. The desire to keep kids entertained is common but this can also wear on the adults in the home. 

"Kids need some alone time too. With the virtual schooling, kids need to do different activities so they can decompress on their own, without too much expectation," says Lefebvre. 

"This goes for parents, as well, they need to recharge their batteries. It's not just a weekend, it's not just a March break, it's now five or six weeks in. Parents need to be mindful of their own mental and physical health."

Lefebvre adds stress within the family dynamic can reach a breaking point simply due to the uncertainty of the pandemic situation. The feelings of there being no end in sight can contribute to tension at home, making that time alone all the more important for each member of the household.

There is hope on the horizon for mentally exhausted families. Hands recommends getting outside, taking a walk, doing some gardening or yard work as opportunities to take some time. Hands has also compiled a resource guide with ideas to keep the family busy in a healthy way and has launched a family photo contest.

The good news, says Lefebvre, is "the weather is changing and kids can actually get outside to play."

- Stu Campaigne, Local Journalism Initiative, BayToday.ca